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Things I am pretty sure of

By Walter Geiger There are some things I am pretty sure of after my nearly 56 years of journeying along life’s road. Here are a few. I wonder if you agree. ’¢ The longer a man or woman is in Hollywood with any sort of success, the more likely he or she is to implode. That’s why so-called agents get so rich. ’¢ Highly successful people sweat the small stuff. Attention to detail is critical. ’¢ Cowards always shoot you in the back. ’¢ Perhaps, we could solve our illegal immigration problem by giving California ‘“ with its varietal fruits and nuts ‘“ back to the Mexicans with the promise that, if they won’t cross the border, neither will we. ’¢ If you are on your second month of having to open the driver’s side door of your car to order and pick up your food at the drive-thru, you should eat at home. ’¢ People who eat, drink and smoke themselves into being early customers of The Scooter Store expect you to pay for their health care and will raise holy hell if you park in their handicap spot at IHOP. These same people live for cruises and you should expect to have scooter tire tread marks on your back if you step in front of them in the buffet line. ’¢ The older you get, fishing becomes more about fishing than catching and hunting becomes more about hunting than killing. ’¢ Feeding an able-bodied man who will not fend for himself or his family does neither him nor his family any good. It only encourages sorriness in the man and his children. Hunger is, after all, a prime motivator. ’¢ Be very, very wary of any person who does not like dogs. ’¢ The preservation at all costs of self-esteem is overrated. There will always be winners and there will always be losers. The pain of losing has driven many champions. Rewarding losing, on the other hand, simply creates contented losers. ’¢ If on an aircraft suffering engine failure, ask for five coat hangers and an armload of fishing gear then jump out an open door. You are sure to get hung up on something before you hit the ground. ’¢ The good old days are more old than good. The more time you spend pining for them, the more likely it is you are neglecting the present and future. ’¢ Schools can only be as good as the parents of the children who attend them. ’¢ Coyotes and armadillos will always be with us. They are too adaptable to be eliminated. ’¢ Chain gangs may have become politically incorrect but they were effective. Life in our jails and prisons should be sufficiently harsh as to deter inmates with any hope at all of release from ever wanting to return. ’¢ Were the world run solely by heterosexual males, there would be no such thing as throw pillows. ’¢ And, finally, a daughter’s love for her Daddy is a special thing indeed.

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